Afro ADHD: 😓

So a guy that I really liked pretty much wants nothing to do with me because he says I insulted him😓. I really liked him and it seemed he liked me too…

Before people have told me that I say things which can really be off kilter but I thought previously that maybe it’s just a mix up in communication until someone from a complete different part of the world also said the same thing.

Being ADHD ( no excuse) can mean that sometimes you have no filter and offend people without meaning to. Considering the person is from a culture where people are blunt there’s no excuse for my words. All I can do is eat them and atone for my sins😓.

I’m going to mind what I say a bit more and apologize sooner when I say something that that’s a bit off kilter. Part of growing up is taking responsibility for our bad behavior and I suppose this is mine moment to…have a walk of shame and think about how my shit behavior and mouth affects others just like I expect people to take accountability for their actions, I need to take accountability for mine ( that was a mouthful and run-on sentence I know).

But life is a learning experience. I’ll be the first to admit that I get a bit defensive when people call me out. Partly because I come from a conservative culture that’s ready to demonize women for the slightest thing so it can make one feel like they’re constantly under attack for the slightest thing. Mostly because I have an ego that I need to work on so that I can function better in society.

I’ll work on taking steps to watch my words and create some sort of filter. Perhaps with meds and more ADHD therapy I’ll get there. I’m just genuinely sorry to the person I hurt because they didn’t deserve that.

UPDATE: Well here’s a reason why you don’t drunk text someone that you stopped talking to on dating apps 😅. Everything that happens becomes majorly exaggerated. I know I may have a weak filter but after talking to many people (while still drunk) they all told me that I shouldn’t get so emotional over a random guy I met over the internet because people who actually knew me in real life know that I’m not the type of person that says things just to hurt someone although I may not always able communicate in a way that is understandable. I’m always quick to apologize when I’m in the wrong and if someone chooses to not accept a genuine apology over a small issue they were never meant to be in your life anyway. I mean I don’t use ADHD as a crutch for bad behavior, but I’m also not going to strain myself wondering if everything that I say may be interpreted as an offense. And if it is…then a person should rather tell me that I’m being an asshole and not wait until I drunk text to figure out what’s happening 🤷🏾‍♀️.

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