Failing to Adult

Failing to Adult: Bills Accruing

Money doesn’t fall from the sky

Growing up was one of my biggest dreams while growing up with…big scam. No one tells you about how much of your life when you with your parents was being covered by guardians. I imagined the freedom and the ability to buy and do whatever I wanted. And I thought that I was going to achieve it because I managed to move out…with unexpected extra costs that have made my move bumpy and made sure that I couldn’t exactly move the way I wanted.

As you all know, my previous living arrangement was not at all ideal. I was having a tough time especially mentally under the same roof as my mother. I don’t regret moving out at all. It’s just the realities of taking care of myself are hitting me hard…in the form of bills. That’s one of the disadvantages of moving out at a later stage when you have overbearing parents…things that you should have mastered at a younger stage…but them oh well.

After eating air for a few days because I not budgeting food well and walking long distances because my bus card is outta funds… I realize that this is an absolutely vital part of its growth as a fully functional human being….even if my stomach is craving home-made meals. Independence, peace, and mental health can initially come at a high cost.

The age where I’ll finally be able to afford shit

Coming from a continent where there are a lot of poverty one of the things that I’m particularly sensitive about is living a decent life. I’d rather starve and pay higher rent than live in substandard accommodation. One thing about adulting is that life is very unexpected. You don’t know what might pop up.

I just went through my savings because of some unexpected issues and had a top client of mine back out…the client I relied on for rent(my mistake) so it’s been a rollercoaster for the past few weeks. This is why they say in most African cultures that you shouldn’t tell people you’re moving until you’ve arrived. I feel like someone has been giving me the evil eye (which I learned recently is when someone sees you or thinks about you and wishes ill on you). Like my finances were great and consistent since November last year. Then I decide to move and kaput!

It baffles me when I see a lot of influencers who are barely eighteen afford to rent an entire apartment and keep a fridge full of food… what material is Gen Z made of and can I have some of that, please? I mean where are the bloggers and vloggers that are going hungry until paycheck comes in and living off ramen for a few months because they can’t afford food? Where are the bloggers and vloggers that had to sell something they really didn’t want to because they couldn’t make rent after unexpectedly falling sick and insurance not covering their hospital bills? Where are the…okay, you probably get it by now. But these high levels of perfection that content creators consistently show on their platforms are often carefully curated to hide the truth. I know that not everyone can wear their pain on their sleeve, but c’mon they can’t all be the Queen of Sheba right?

Adulting is like maths. Some people are able to do it naturally while others never catch on. I think that I’m somewhere in the middle and if I want to play the neurodivergent card I might say that I’m an early bloomer (don’t give me that side-eye). I’m beginning to understand why some people are against capitalism…we spend so much time working for things that should be freely available to everyone like food and housing. We also ignore that it’s a privilege to have those amenities freely provided by guardians and not have to worry about that from a young age.

I won’t lie, I had forgotten how expensive it was to have to take care of yourself. Like seriously though, that moment when you remember that salt is bought and it doesn’t magically appear in your kitchen is an eye-opener. An eye-opener that I would rather do without, but anyway “I got bills I gotta pay…so I’m gonna work each and every day!”

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